Top 100 Things I’ve Done – #19

Top 100 Things I've Done Add comments

Have surgery.

My mortality became most evident to me the day they cut my body open and changed something inside. It was only hernia surgery, but it was my first time being cut open. I use to think hirneas were hemorrhoids, so for those other’s of you that do…let me explain. Evidently I over-exerted myself while carrying band equipment and my ab muscles pushed my intestines into my balls. That’s a hernia. So they had to cut me open, put my intestines back and sew a little plastic cone into the hole in my intestinal wall.

I had elected for partial anesthesia. That meant I would be somewhat conscious during the surgery. They gassed me up a bit then gave me a shot of novicane in the spine. I couldn’t feel my legs and I could tell what was going on, but nothing mattered much. I had no concept of time, but I could tell what was happening. All the medical people in white were leaning over me. I had the classic view from an operating table. They had a sheet propped up so I couldn’t see them pulling and poking at my guts. Feeling it was still freaky. I couldn’t’ feel pain, but could feel the pressure and what not of things moving around inside me. I think I started to get a little too wacky, because I was asking werid questions. I even demanded they changed the music the surgeon was listening to saying “this music kinda sucks, can you change it”. I don’t remember much after that…so I think they turned up the gas. Hah.

A week or so on the couch and I started to recover. Laughing hurt the most, so visits from friends were good and bad. The whole experience put me in such awe of the medical world. It also left me feeling like my body was so separate from my essence of being. I have no control over what goes on inside me. I can’t fix anything that breaks, so I’m glad there are people that can. Living life, hoping something doesn’t break, which can’t be fixed is scary for me. It’s just another thing that makes it impossible for me to put happiness on hold.

One Thought on “Top 100 Things I’ve Done – #19”

  1. ksunturtle Says:

    The staples I can handle but could you have had surgery in a hairer spot my goodness! You were lucky they were able to find it! HAHAH

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